my friend matthew

You know those dogs that retarded people in wheelchairs have? Yeah the one's that help them open tin cans and write letters home and stuff. When I grow up and get a dog, I hope I get one that originally belonged to a retard in a wheelchair. Then the dog would be like, "Wow this guy is smart, he can make his own sandwiches and buckle himself up in the car." The dog would love me compared to a retard.