my friend matthew
theme: once upon a time i was young and confused
Saturday, August 30, 2003
I'm going to miss you Dorie Young, thanks for tonight, seriously tell your parents thanks for the movie. I think I forgot. Actually have your mom read this. THANK YOU MRS. YOUNG!!!!
Ok, so driving unquestionably has its perks but it’s just one more thing that I’ve come to put under my belt. It’s only my second day and I’m looking for something else. It’s sad how we take things for granted. I’ve only got two months ‘till I can legally drive with passengers but oh can’t I wait!
Smile GOD Loves You - Is bouncing around on my desk. He's so cute. I wind him up and let him go free. He's so happy all the time, he really picks me up. (If ya know what I mean *nudge-nudge*)
Friday, August 29, 2003
You are reading the blog of a LICENSED DRIVER! OMG, I can't believe it's true. So what did I do with this new-found freedom you ask? First, I went to Dordor's house, then the gas station, then Gregory's, then Carlee's, then the pool hall with Gregory, then home. YAY!
Oh, and Paggi, stay home tonight.
Today is gonna be stressful. I have to take pictures at 900 and then my behind the wheel test is at 420. So much is expected of me, can I really deal with this? I hope and pray that I pass the first time. It's just been sooo long. Everyone else started driving on their 16th birthdays, and I'm almost 18. But anyway, maybe that's why I'm making this such a big deal. Whatever, I'll just have a few beers before, so I'm more relaxed. J/K
There's a way to go about things, and I don't know how to do any of that.
Wednesday, August 27, 2003
I say all the wrong things at exactly the right times.
Mars looks exquisite. Yes we're out here looking at the STARS... I mean STAR... I mean PLANET...
The end of a slow day seems to be very fast if you ask me.
Tuesday, August 26, 2003
I think this is my last post for today. I just want to say sorry to everyone I tripped out on yesterday. Thanks for having patience with me guys, you all are amazing for taking my random shit. If I had some lunatic randomly yelling at me I would tell him to go eat some of the stuff under the kitchen sink (the stuff you're not supposed to eat). Those of you who have had patience with me are truly awesome. Sorry I didn't really act like it yesterday, but I really appreciate that sort of thing.
I found half of my peanutbutter and chocolate chunk sandwich. It's kinda stale and like 5 hours old, but I'm down.... Ooooo, it's still wonderful!
Today was a really slow day. Have you ever had those moments where you feel smarter than EVERYONE around you? That's what half my day was like, and the other half was just monotonous and mind numbing. Lunch was cool. I introduced Dorie and Rachel to my Redwood friends (God knows that doesn't always go well) and everyone seemed fine with eachother. No akwardness or anything. KG even showed them a picture of her belly. WOAH!!! KG is usually SUPERshy. Anyway, it was cool, even though no one really ate. I plan on buying mass amounts of food for just those occasions. So lunch rocked, it's always nice to see the Fresh Apples.
Ok, PROCESS COMPLETE... I'm crazy, woop-de-doo. It doesn't feel that different. The only thing is that I might just start yelling at the next person who complains about the way I look. I DON'T LOOK THIS WAY FOR YOU! So please stop. Yeah, I know, people are supposed to let it "roll of their shoulders" but not me, not now. I can't. If someone (random) complains to me about me, I might trip out and eat them or something. I can't even imagine what I would do. I just know that they'll regret bugging Mr. CRAZY.
Monday, August 25, 2003
I'm honestly going crazy.
I need skin, your skin. Just hand it over, you're life isn't full of drama is it? If it is, forget it. I just need to be NEW. Change is good. I need to change. I want to be an asshole. Yeah. I'll be an asshole. That's always fulfilling.
Ok, so I know I'm a drama magnet. Maybe, I'm a drama factory. But whatever the case may be, I've never had so many people mad at me at one time. It'll die down someday but geese, this is horrible. Some people have reasons to be mad and some don't (they just think they do). I just can't wait till it all goes away. Now if there's a catalyst to hurry the time it takes, I'd bust it out. Please tell me if you know of one...
"In the industry, we call them cigarette burns" (Tyler points to the upper-right hand corner of the screen, "bloop" sound)
-Fight Club
Sunday, August 24, 2003
I REALLY REALLY REALLY want to write about "girls" and how much I'm obsessed with them. But I'll restrain. I know that it's not that entertaining. Writing about other conversations is possibly the most boring thing I read. I don't want to talk about talking. I want to talk about the sun and the moon and the music in my head. Not some boy or some girl that listens to the same music I do, or shops at the same store, or plays the guitar or whatever the case. I know I've done it in the past. From now on, it will be about interresting experiences I have; thoughts in my head; crazy colors or sounds; ANYTHING beside other people.
Dude, Jason was on "I Love the 80's" He's my daddy.
Sunday's suck. I found my bike, my mom hid it from me to teach me a lesson for leaving it out.
I want a typewriter. A bloody noisey one, I want to waste paper and really hit the keys. No more of this Microsoft Word bullshit. I'm going oldschool with my "nothing" of a screenplay. If you know of an old typewriter that really makes noise, tell me... (eatsnowitswater@hotmail.com)
Saturday, August 23, 2003
My bike has been stolen
My hair's gone. Haha, it's sooo short. I had a pretty good day today with Dorie, Rachel and Matthew. Relaxing. Figured a lot out. It was productive.
on a sadder note: Someone has told me enough, I will now stop. Sorry I tried to hold on for so long. I just wanted a friendship, and you said it was out of the question. I understand, it's over.
I'm being a mean person. How do I change?
People like me, they really do. I know this because they show me sometimes. (emphasis on the "sometimes")
Friday, August 22, 2003
I'm a lonely little baby who complains about everything that's wrong with the world. Well here's one more thing... HAHA, you don't get it do you...
It's like studying and taking all the notes you possibly could have, but getting an F on the test. I'm so frustrated right now. Don't build me up then act like I'm nothing. I can't even begin to express my frustration. There aren't words. I just really got my hopes up. I really focused on this goal, and now I can't obtain it. No one will ever understand what it's like to be alone and working so hard for what turns out to be nothing.
Thursday, August 21, 2003
So everyone's got plans for tomorrow. It's Ice Breakah!!! I don't. So far, I'm doing the job thing and trying to impress my parents. I'm UnGrounded but I still need to show responsibility before I'm allowed to do anything. I guess I feel like a little kid, but I gotta give it to 'em since I still act like one. Maybe I'll get to go do something. I'm patient.
Here it is, rock bottom:
Today is the first and last day that I'll wish I was never born. Tomorrow I'll wish that I never lived in Visalia, and By next Monday I'll just be wishing I never met the people I have. Not because I don't appreciate them, but because they constantly assume that I'm an asshole. The most straight thing I can state is that PEOPLE MISTAKE MY FELLOWSHIP FOR EVERYTHING THAT IT IS NOT. Thanks for trying to tolerate me, I appreciate the effort. To all friends of mine (who ever that may be), please know that I'll be as honest as possible with you always. If you ever have your doubts, please ask me.
At least I don't have to change the name of my website (yet) Matthew's still ok with me.
So, I apologized to an old foe (I like to refer to as the mouse from Cinderella (the one who can't carry all the kernels of corn)) and afterward, I felt pretty good about myself. Maybe I didn't apologize, maybe I just agreed with him. Anyway, it's the second day of school today. I'm looking forward to it actually. All my teachers seem like fun, or at least a little manipulatable. (word?) Today should be great. I turned in my Walgreen's application last night and am turning in my American Ambulance one this evening. Envious of bigwordusers, I've decided to make myself a little stack of flash cards with extended vocabulary words on them to learn from. My poor mother has to leave at 725 to take my bro and sis to school and then come back and get me, because I wasn't ready in time to go with her. I need my license baaaad. Oh yeah! And I scheduled with the DMV (dum da dumdum) yesterday and I have my drive test Next Friday (movie) I'm so freaking anxious. So all in all things are looking up.
P.S. - Pray for the mouse from Cinderella, his knee's bum.
Wednesday, August 20, 2003
If you do ONE thing today, please check out Alex's website! It's AMAZING!!! Her blogs are the BEST! Go there: Alex Kleeman
Tuesday, August 19, 2003
The best way to fall asleep on a night where the next day is going to be something exciting (like the 1st day of school) is to turn on a B.O.T. (book on tape according to matthew) it'll throw you straight down that hole we know as slumber. Tomorrow it'll be known as the sweet slumber and I can say so long.
I just spent the last 5 hours of my life with my mom doing quite a number of crazy things:
Turning in papers/Picking up my high school schedule (twice)
Applying for administration at COS
Crashing classes at COS
Picking up Job Applications
Turning in Job applications
Getting work permits
Getting lost out by American Ambulance
Picking up Taco Bell
-sorry we didn't get to hang out Dorie... I begged them...-
How do you show someone how much you care for them? I'm not doin' too well with that. Maybe she just doesn't see or recognize it. Maybe I should wait a little longer before I tattoo it on my forehead. Yeah, just a little.
Monday, August 18, 2003
SALE!!!
The ALL NEW
MachineGUN Rocket Alien Boobies Tortillas (for MEN)
Sold at your local supermarket next to the Old Mexican Lady Tortillas
(you know... the ones with the old lady making tortillas on the package)
Does your sunshine talk to you? Mine does!
I FOUND MY WALLET!!! HAHA!!! I rock... and roll... all day long!
I'm getting way too grizzley. I think I'm gonna cut my hair or shave my beard soon. One or the other. It has to happen. But oh, don't worry I'll let all you guys see it at school. Probably for a day or two. Then one of them is gone. I should take a vote on whether it should be shorthair and beard or long hair no beard. I personally am leaning toward cutting my hair. It's really nasty. But first I'll dress up as a caveman.
I love Visalia. I love the beach and all, but every time I come back here, I'm overwhelmed with comfort. I love everyone here. I love the simpleness of my situation with everyone. It's really comforting to know that people care about you yet there's no anxiety from anything your stuck with. Still trying to get a job. I need some damn papers from school or something. Like a work permit. Whatever, I'll probably go get them today.
Friday, August 15, 2003
BEACH!!!
Thursday, August 14, 2003
ARG!!! My 3 year old cousin just tore my 200 dollar miniDISK player apart!!! OH my gosh, I'm sooo mad.
I began to explain of my great care for you; subtle responses made me assume. Tell me whatever you want to tell me, don't hold back. I can deal with whatever it is...
Wednesday, August 13, 2003
I strongly suggest Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris
Shall we not excuse ourselves in the manner that we are hereby appointed? I'm unsure of the answer, how about you go figure it out and let me know.
Tuesday, August 12, 2003
OK folks, so I've told a select few about my grand Idea for a movie. Actually my idea is to use someone else's idea, but write it into a screen play.
OMG HAYLEY's HOME!!! I seen her this morning and it sure was weird. I haven't seen Hayley in so long. I really missed you friend, I know you don't think so. I want to ride my bike to Border's, so if someone wants to magically meet me there, that's ok with me.
I'm down with the Old Hopeadope again, sorry about all the rough times popo. This next year will be filled with SUNSHINE for EVERYONE!!!
Everyone's buying rims but I personally want TIRES!!! Taylors got a squadron of these badboys on his Wrangler. I want some on my blazer.
No matter what, nothing I do is ever enough.
Monday, August 11, 2003
So my list of 5 job sites (requested by my father) includes:
-On Shore
-Juice Appeal (I know, I'm copying Matthew)
-Borders
-B-Dalton (Any bookstore for that matter)
-SJVC copy boy
So I have to go pick up applications. This sucks major bizzalls. Wish me luck young padewon
Umm. Yeah, my dad made me quit polo and now I have to find a job. My life sucks. I'm sorry guys if you've tried to reach me and I've been unavailable. I'll try and get online as much as possible. Sorry Doorz :( I feel horrible.
Sunday, August 10, 2003
Ok guys, I'm home, but in trouble. I was supposed to turn in a certain Boy Scout form a while ago and kinda acted like i did when i was asked. My dad found out about it and is really pissed off. I'm not even supposed to be on the computer so sorry that I can't return calls right now or anything like that.
My buddy Grant has this massive movie collection that mine could never live up to. I seriously want to start a huge collection of movies, and since I don't have enough random amounts of money to have a collection as huge as Grant's, it's going to be a collection of only good movies first, no basic comedies... Although, they can rock. My first focus will be good screenplays and the weird stuff first. My list starts off like this, (hugely influenced by Dorie Young by the way)
Bottle Rocket
Virgin Suicides
Rushmore
The Royal Tenenbaums
Donnie Darko (maybe)
Dazed and Confused
(sorta want) Rebel Without a Cause
Rounders
Death to Smoochy
12 Monkeys
Yeah, so that will get my movie collection started... OHOH, and add the Tarantino films on there as well. Dorie again... :) Miss you much!
Wow! That girl from "Freaky Friday" is seriously almost perfectly beautiful (in my eyes). Honestly though, if that face doesn't blow you away, I dunno what does. I'm seriously tearing-up, I'm in awe of her.
Saturday, August 09, 2003
So, I'm here at the beach, but it's AAALLLLL screwed up. My family ditched me and it's just my bro and I here with my Aunt, Uncle, Aaron, TayTay and Alex. It's seriously been fun so far but they're way too busy to give me a ride to go see the Dork. Sorry Dorie. We'll seriously chill when I you get back. ARG, and next week is "inspiration" week for polo. I'm so busy and I don't even know it yet. In the last month I've spent like 2 days at my home. I'm sorta trippin' about that.
Friday, August 08, 2003
I think I really like being happy, and your closest friends can really help bring that out in you. So I got home from Bass yesterday and I was just now sitting in the living room watching My Life as a Teenage Robot, when my dad walks in and announces that we're leaving to go to the beach in 2 hours. I never get a freakin' rest man. Yet I'm totally stoaked for I may see the Dork over there. Happy Birthday Taylor! Anyway, it's bitter-sweet so far. OH MAN!!! I'm supposed to hang out with old friends tonight too! This sucks man.
Saturday, August 02, 2003
For some odd reason, there's a vintage style slot machine in my living room.
Friday, August 01, 2003
Oh man, I miss the Dork..... Hey Rachel! Me and you and matt should get together after we get back from Bass. We'll do some crap... Yeah. We should go see a movie or just sit around on our assi... (plural for ass)
My count-down begins now. Dorie just left me. She won't be back until the 11th. Geese man! 25 days with only 6 hours of chillin time. That's harsh.
Day 1... No, Hour 1 - This is brutal. Abcense makes the heart grow fonder, or something like that. I'm going to Bass tomorrow anyway, I should be semi-ok for the next few days...
Come back kitty!
Ok, so I didn't go to sleep. I've been doing laundry and getting all ready to go on our morning bike ride. Dorie: The silly goose flies at midnight (Code for: I'll tap on your window at 6)
Uh, how does that go again..? Oh yeah, "Heeere's JOHNNY!!!"
Yes yes, thank you very much. Thank you. So as you can see, I did NOT die in Yellowstone. In fact I was probably doing just the opposite: you guessed it! Being born again. But seriously, after the brown hat incident and the endless cycling, something changed inside of me. I'm not the same guy folks. I am seriously hermit status. The only thing I lack is a bit of grey in my beard. I look like a young version of Mickey O'Neill who hasn't seen a milk chake in years. THANKS for my sidewalk creation guys, very artsy! I like the sumo wrestler. Wow, so much text in my mind, it's just flowing like puke after a bad eggroll. Glad to be home guys. You probably don't even chack back any more. HAHA, you will someday, yes you will... *Paully Shore style* DORIE YOUNG is SoOoOoO GREA-SY!! Peace, I'll save some of this crap for tomorrow!
Can I have a sip of that? I'd like
to know what a five-dollar shake
tastes like.
-VINCENT
